Be encouraged and be happy for as you read further you will see how I overcame panic attacks, fear and came to complete peace and Joy.
You may have reached this page seeking help, looking for hope or out of plain curiosity. I can assure you will not be disappointed but you can receive healing and deliverance if you will pay attention and follow my story completely. This is a real story of my life. Once my life was out of control: hopeless, terrified , with panic attacks and depression. I was slowly fading away into oblivion. It was fear of death and a constant shadow of grief over a life that was planned to be simply great. We have many plans but not all become realities; they are not in our control and that was my experience and my story. But be encouraged and be happy for as you read further you will see how I overcame panic attacks, fear and came to complete peace and joy in the Lord Jesus Christ. May God blessing mercy and grace be with you.
First panic attack
Who could help me? My parents, friends and my wife could not even understand this fear.
I was on my computer early morning around 9 A.M. For some reason I started feeling uneasy, my heart started pounding and I could not understand what was happening. I was filled with the fear of death.
Panic attack is a condition caused long term exposure to stress and anxiety. I had this panic attack in 2002 , and I was just 29 years old. At that moment I felt as if I was dying. I had no control in that moment: just terror, fear and overwhelming helplessness. There was no reason or any rational logic behind that fear. Where could I go, Who could help me? My parents, friends and my wife could not even understand this fear.
Why did it happen?
A life style of sin and a life time of sin catches up with us, weakens us and produces death in us.
I grew up in a dysfunctional, violent, stressed out family with constant financial strain. I grew up to follow my survival instincts “Whatever it takes”. So I grew up constantly trying to overcome the fear of uncertainty and insecurity in life.I worked hard and was ambitious to be prosperous and powerful. My mother was Hindu and my father was an atheist, so I had some idea of God and religion in my life but there was no godliness either in my life or my family.
My life was a patched up life with no real stability emotionally and mentally. I lived with an aggressive and desperate philosophy of “Whatever it takes” (e.g lies, manipulation, cheating, intimidation) in my personal life and professional life. I became a software programmer with an ambition to go to America and make money. In my desire to grow in my career I used to work long hours for a company sometimes around 14-16 hours a day, and eventually I was stressed out mentally and physically. I simply ran out of strength, hope and joy and my body broke down.
Terrified and crippled
Fear was unrelenting day and night all it needed was a fearful thought to trigger the attack.
I went to a doctor for diagnosis and was told it was a panic attack so they gave me a tranquilizer to calm me down. It did not make any sense to me at that time because I did not understand how it could cure my mind so I decided not to take the medication. Over days the attacks kept coming. I tried many different tactics, like breathing slowly, distracting myself in movies, books and alcohol, but fear of death was always on the back of my mind. It would come like a fierce wave of terrifying fear, which was irrational and crippling. It just made me fold down in fear and gasp for something as simple and critical as breathing. I had no help and no permanent solution. My body was just malfunctioning and that was frightening.
Fear was unrelenting day and night, all it needed was a fearful thought to trigger the attack. To sleep was a great comfort but to wake up was terrifying because fear was always ready to take over.
I realized that that idols could not listen or help or heal.
Out of desperation I sought every Hindu god I knew, I asked my childhood friend for guidance. he was a hindu and very religious, through hum I found out the best direction to pray, right chants to say and right gods to pray. I would ritually purify my body with bath and pray day after day earnestly, sincerely and desperately. I even prayed to Jesus toward the end of my list. Simply speaking no idol could hear my prayer later I realized that that idols could not listen or help or heal..
A place where I found hope
A member of my family invited me to a church. I liked going to church not for God but for their serene ambience, the music, singing was therapeutic for me but I never went to meet God. Once inside the church I was good as long as I did not remember the fear but the moment i remembered I was a slave to fear, breathing hard, trying to control my mind, it was just a extremely stressful and nightmarish experience.
A great burden was gone, my fear was gone, my depression was gone. Relief, calm, relaxed, light, happy! Thank you Jesus ! Free at last!
A preacher spoke about Jesus, I do not remember much of what he said but I remember he said that Jesus had the power to heal. He said Jesus was the son of God. I was desperate to try anything, anyhow, anywhere. I spoke to Jesus in my heart, one on one, me and Jesus, Jesus and me. I said “if you are God prove it by healing me and I will follow you!”
The preacher laid his hands on me and he prayed. Clearly he was a man of great faith because God hear his prayer. As he laid his hands on me all my desperation welled up, I cried for help and instantly a fire flowed through me, it was instant, powerful, a burden lifted and I could sense it clearly, I cried like a baby for a long time actually I was enjoying crying, I was confessing and asking God for help. This was not just an emotional moment, God’s help came with tremendous power to set me free from the fear of death. Only a true living God has the power to do it.
A great burden was gone, my fear was gone, my depression was gone. Relief, calm, relaxed, light, happy! that’s how I felt. I went out the skies were deep blue never had i seen such skies, the plants looked great everything looked beautiful, joyful. Jesus Christ was real and powerful. He took up my offer, he showed his kindness, his power to heal instantly without a moment of hesitation. It became clear that God exists and answers, Lord Jesus Christ was alive he heard and acted on my behalf with his mercy and grace Instantly.
I had prayed to Jesus along with the other God’s but why was I not healed before?
In hindsight I think that it may be due to a violation of the First of the Ten commandments of God.
Exodus 20:3 “You shall have no other gods before me.”
If I had been healed when I prayed to other gods I would have wrongly believed in the power of idols and I think God wanted me to realize that it was through the Lord Jesus Christ alone “all things are possible”.
I have been free from panic attacks over 14 years and I am ruling fear in the name of Jesus and the power of Jesus.
Jesus Christ can help you, he has the power over life and death and he can heal you instantly right where you are Guaranteed!!
I have been free from panic attacks over 10 years and I am ruling fear in the name of Jesus and the power of Jesus.
How can Jesus Christ help me? by understanding why we become sick in the first place!
What causes sickness?
What is sin?
Sin is what separates people from God, and the consequence of sin is death. I commit sin when I disobey God’s will, and break His laws.
We are not only sick physically but emotionally, mentally and spiritually too. fear is a sickness of the heart and mind and its symptom is a panic attack. We need to cure fear and panic attacks will cease.
Most of the times sickness is an indication of death working in us. God’s helps us in understanding though his word the bible and its written
Rom 6:23 Sin pays off with death. But God’s gift is eternal life given by Jesus Christ our Lord.
some examples of sin are: Worshiping idols, Lying, Murder, unforgivable anger in the heart, desiring others belongings (coveting),Sexual immorality (including thoughts), drunkenness, quarreling, jealousy and may more like these.
Sickness can be a consequence of our sins.
We suffer from sicknesses and death because we are reaping the consequences of our disobedience toward God through the choices we make in our daily life, life style, friends.
Rom 3:23 All of us have sinned and fallen short of God’s glory.
What is the solution to cleansing our sin, Who can save us ?
Jesus satisfied Eternal Justice, then rose from the dead, so that God can grant us eternal life.
A youth once borrowed a fast car, and in a drunken stupor, sped through his home town at 120 m.p.h. Since everything was horse-drawn in his country town, there were no laws against speeding. So the council passed a law saying that 60 m.p.h. was the maximum speed, and that any transgressors would be fined $100 for every m.p.h. over the speed limit. On his way back through the town, the speedster decided to pull the same prank. He was apprehended, tried, and found guilty by his father, who was the town’s only judge. He was fined $10,000, and because he had no money and no words of defense, the youth was led off to prison. As he sat in despair in prison, his father appeared at the door, and told him that he had sold all his own prized possessions and paid the fine for him. The son couldn’t believe that he loved him that much. They embraced as they never had before, and walked off in a new-found relationship, bonded together with love.
That’s a picture of what God did for us through his son Jesus. We have all broken the Law a multitude of times, but God came to this earth in the person of Jesus Christ, and paid the fine for us
—“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” The Bible says, “The wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life, through Christ Jesus our Lord.”
Jesus satisfied Eternal Justice, then rose from the dead, so that God can grant us eternal life. But just as we cannot earn a gift, so we cannot earn eternal life by our good works—“For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone boast.”
Rom 5:8 But God showed His great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.
How can I receive Jesus and be free?
Rom 10:9 If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.
How do I know for sure that I am free?
Rom 8:1 So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus.
The underlying cause of all sickness including panic attacks is separation from God due to our sin.
We can be free from death which is the penalty of sin through the mercy offered by the Lord Jesus Christ. This is not just for panic attacks but for every aspect of your life that needs healing.
Accept your Sin and turn away from it, Believe in the Lord Jesus Christ and trust in him, fully commit to obey his commandments and start doing what he says and you shall be saved